A Message for Random Groups
To those who call themselves "incels," "nice guys," or "nice girls:"
Allow me the indulgence of speaking with you bluntly. There has been a lot of backlash against all of you for reasons that may not seem apparent to you or that you may think are false and demeaning. We as a society may not have interacted with you in the best way possible, and -as a member of that society- I apologize if I have done anything to propagate that behavior and language. On the other hand, it seems that you and those you have decided to connect with have also done a fair share to vilify the society that may have rejected you. You may feel unheard, shoved aside, and generally neglected in a world that is often indifferent to suffering and fairness.
With this in mind, I would like to extend a small olive branch to you in hopes that you will be able to discuss how you feel without judgement and scorn. I feel that everyone needs someone who will listen to their problems and feelings without judgement. Granted, I have opinions on what may be going through your head, but they are often fueled by the worst of your communities. Those people seem to be so hurt that only bringing pain and misery to others will give them a since of relief from their own misery. To those people, I wish to extend the same olive branch. I hope that you can find someone -perhaps me- who will lend you an ear and the time to let you feel like you are being listened to and cared for.
Personally, I was not in your shoes for long. I was once a young girl who had no prospects of romance. But my own romantic life quickly became one of on-and-off relationships with passionate displays of affection and shallow communications with my boyfriends. Until recently, my romantic life felt more like catch-and-release than anything. But this isn't about me, and -honestly- I don't want it to be. I want to set aside my own judgements, biases, and general assumptions of you in order to truly learn about how you feel. I want to learn more about you and how you feel in this world. I can't promise that I will be totally understanding all the time, but I will do my best. When you just need someone to listen to your story, I will do my best. When you need some input on a thought you've had, I will do my best to show you different perspectives I have collected over my short life. When you want some serious advice, I will do my best with what I know and I have come to understand.
I hope I will not be the only one to do so for you. I've observed the judgements that our general society gives to you. Often, they are indifferent at best and downright insulting at worst. To give them a fair shake, they only see what they want to see out of the worst of your communities. Do all of you go and commit acts of vengeance? No. Do you all post horrible things about those who rejected you, either personally or in general society? No. Have all of you generally been seen as a cancer in society that needs to be removed because of these people? Absolutely. I am ashamed of my generation and those before and after me for doing this. We all seem to be a collective of hurt people continuing to hurt each other in order to find some sort of relief from the pain. It is self-destructive, but it is what we seem to do when we are hurt. I am sorry for the hurt you may have experienced or are experiencing right now. Sadly, I can only be sorry for the things I have directly or indirectly done.
Please, sit down with me. Write in the comments. Get a hold of me on social media. If you know me personally, talk to me. I would love to sit down and listen to your story and how you feel. Maybe then we can both find a way to help society and make it a better place for everyone. Until we chat, hold onto what is good about you, and work on what you find is a problem. Do your best to take care of yourself and to improve yourself in all areas of life. Find the help you need, and get away from those who only seek to hurt you or to send you down a path of harm against yourself or others. Make sure that you come out of this experience and part of your life alive.
I look forward to hearing from you, and I hope that this message will find you in good timing.
Much Love, Hope, and Strength,
Animus
Allow me the indulgence of speaking with you bluntly. There has been a lot of backlash against all of you for reasons that may not seem apparent to you or that you may think are false and demeaning. We as a society may not have interacted with you in the best way possible, and -as a member of that society- I apologize if I have done anything to propagate that behavior and language. On the other hand, it seems that you and those you have decided to connect with have also done a fair share to vilify the society that may have rejected you. You may feel unheard, shoved aside, and generally neglected in a world that is often indifferent to suffering and fairness.
With this in mind, I would like to extend a small olive branch to you in hopes that you will be able to discuss how you feel without judgement and scorn. I feel that everyone needs someone who will listen to their problems and feelings without judgement. Granted, I have opinions on what may be going through your head, but they are often fueled by the worst of your communities. Those people seem to be so hurt that only bringing pain and misery to others will give them a since of relief from their own misery. To those people, I wish to extend the same olive branch. I hope that you can find someone -perhaps me- who will lend you an ear and the time to let you feel like you are being listened to and cared for.
Personally, I was not in your shoes for long. I was once a young girl who had no prospects of romance. But my own romantic life quickly became one of on-and-off relationships with passionate displays of affection and shallow communications with my boyfriends. Until recently, my romantic life felt more like catch-and-release than anything. But this isn't about me, and -honestly- I don't want it to be. I want to set aside my own judgements, biases, and general assumptions of you in order to truly learn about how you feel. I want to learn more about you and how you feel in this world. I can't promise that I will be totally understanding all the time, but I will do my best. When you just need someone to listen to your story, I will do my best. When you need some input on a thought you've had, I will do my best to show you different perspectives I have collected over my short life. When you want some serious advice, I will do my best with what I know and I have come to understand.
I hope I will not be the only one to do so for you. I've observed the judgements that our general society gives to you. Often, they are indifferent at best and downright insulting at worst. To give them a fair shake, they only see what they want to see out of the worst of your communities. Do all of you go and commit acts of vengeance? No. Do you all post horrible things about those who rejected you, either personally or in general society? No. Have all of you generally been seen as a cancer in society that needs to be removed because of these people? Absolutely. I am ashamed of my generation and those before and after me for doing this. We all seem to be a collective of hurt people continuing to hurt each other in order to find some sort of relief from the pain. It is self-destructive, but it is what we seem to do when we are hurt. I am sorry for the hurt you may have experienced or are experiencing right now. Sadly, I can only be sorry for the things I have directly or indirectly done.
Please, sit down with me. Write in the comments. Get a hold of me on social media. If you know me personally, talk to me. I would love to sit down and listen to your story and how you feel. Maybe then we can both find a way to help society and make it a better place for everyone. Until we chat, hold onto what is good about you, and work on what you find is a problem. Do your best to take care of yourself and to improve yourself in all areas of life. Find the help you need, and get away from those who only seek to hurt you or to send you down a path of harm against yourself or others. Make sure that you come out of this experience and part of your life alive.
I look forward to hearing from you, and I hope that this message will find you in good timing.
Much Love, Hope, and Strength,
Animus
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